Arafed man in the water with a bottle of beer and a shark

In the putrid cesspool of late Soviet politics, a beady-eyed rat was learning to swim. Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin, a snot-nosed recruit from Leningrad’s back alleys, wormed his way into the KGB’s ranks. This crafty little shit, barely out of his teens, had already mastered the art of licking the right boots and stabbing the right backs.