Welcome to Putin's extraction economy, where the only things pumped faster than

Welcome to Putin's extraction economy, where the only things pumped faster than oil are bullets and bullshit. Strap in, comrades, because we're about to take a blood-soaked ride through Russia's resurgence as a petro-state powerhouse. Let's start with a little history lesson. Back in 1999, while Putin was still playing second fiddle to the vodka-soaked Yeltsin, Russia was ass-deep in the Second Chechen War. Now, the official line was that this was about crushing terrorists and preserving Russia's territorial integrity. But let's cut the crap - this was about oil, gas, and showing the world that Russia still had the balls to crush a rebellion, human rights be damned. Chechnya, you see, sits on a nice little nest of oil reserves and, more importantly, some critical pipelines. Putin, with all the subtlety of a sledgehammer, decided that if he couldn't control it, he'd rather see it burn. And burn it did. Grozny was turned into a pile of rubble that made Dresden look like a picnic. Thousands of civilians? Collateral damage. Human rights? A Western conspiracy. But here's the kicker - it worked. Putin's iron-fisted approach in Chechnya made him a hero back home. Russians, tired of feeling like the world's punching bag, suddenly had a leader who wasn't afraid to throw a few punches of his own. Never mind the body count - Russia was strong again! With Chechnya under control (and by "control," I mean "occupied by a Putin-friendly warlord"), it was time for our boy Vova to turn his attention to Russia's real ticket to the big leagues: its vast natural resources. Now, let's be clear - Russia's always been resource-rich. But under Yeltsin, the oil and gas industries were a free-for-all, with oligarchs carving up the sector like hungry dogs fighting over a steak. Putin had a different vision. He wanted to turn Russia's resources into a weapon, both to enrich his cronies and to bludgeon Russia's neighbors into submission. Enter Gazprom, the state-controlled gas giant. Under Putin
Prompts
Copy
Welcome to Putin's extraction economy
,
where the only things pumped faster than oil are bullets and bullshit
.
Strap in
,
comrades
,
because we're about to take a blood-soaked ride through Russia's resurgence as a petro-state powerhouse
.
Let's start with a little history lesson
.
Back in 1999
,
while Putin was still playing second fiddle to the vodka-soaked Yeltsin
,
Russia was ass-deep in the Second Chechen War
.
Now
,
the official line was that this was about crushing terrorists and preserving Russia's territorial integrity
.
But let's cut the crap - this was about oil
,
gas
,
and showing the world that Russia still had the balls to crush a rebellion
,
human rights be damned
.
Chechnya
,
you see
,
sits on a nice little nest of oil reserves and
,
more importantly
,
some critical pipelines
.
Putin
,
with all the subtlety of a sledgehammer
,
decided that if he couldn't control it
,
he'd rather see it burn
.
And burn it did
.
Grozny was turned into a pile of rubble that made Dresden look like a picnic
.
Thousands of civilians
?
Collateral damage
.
Human rights
?
A Western conspiracy
.
But here's the kicker - it worked
.
Putin's iron-fisted approach in Chechnya made him a hero back home
.
Russians
,
tired of feeling like the world's punching bag
,
suddenly had a leader who wasn't afraid to throw a few punches of his own
.
Never mind the body count - Russia was strong again
!
With Chechnya under control (and by "control
,
" I mean "occupied by a Putin-friendly warlord")
,
it was time for our boy Vova to turn his attention to Russia's real ticket to the big leagues: its vast natural resources
.
Now
,
let's be clear - Russia's always been resource-rich
.
But under Yeltsin
,
the oil and gas industries were a free-for-all
,
with oligarchs carving up the sector like hungry dogs fighting over a steak
.
Putin had a different vision
.
He wanted to turn Russia's resources into a weapon
,
both to enrich his cronies and to bludgeon Russia's neighbors into submission
.
Enter Gazprom
,
the state-controlled gas giant
.
Under Putin
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